Just writing it down cause it helps greatly.......
Yes, I have lots of problems but this one needs its own journal...
At my mother's house, yay???
No, sure I love spending time with my mom but she has a little drunk companion here too.
This man drinks/smokes from the moment he wakes up till he passes out.
Whatever, I don't judge, or try to. I'm polite as always, shy at the most.
"Is your daughter retarded? She can't talk?"
Me: I beg your pardon, that was incredibly rude...
Mom: -LAUGHS- She's just shy
That's a nice first impression there, buddy...Okay, whatever, I'm going to forgive and forget.
"Why is she so damn pale??? Why does she wear so much Goddamn black? Those piercings are horrible on you, are you goth? You're not Pansexual, you don't even know what you even like. Why do you squint like that? Why do you not talk? It's like talking to a wall. God hates gays. -LOOKS DOWN MY DAMN SHIRT AS I'M WORKING OUT//"
Nearly biting my tongue off here then "She's so goddamn fat, look at that ass...Girl, you're so fat..."
And just like any person would do to a bully I snapped...after I yelled my mom just laughed as if she didn't even give a shit....Thanks...It's nice to know what you think of me...
Laugh with them
Later I get a phone call but that's a differnt story...broke my thumb or sprained, whatever...Stops having a panic attack and sobbing.
-He wakes up-
My mother and I were in bed ready to rest. My day of going into panic attack after panic attack mentally drained me.
-He blasts up the radio and starts singing loud with it-
It's fine, I close my eyes but starts hearing him whispering things about MY SLEEPING MOTHER.
I turn toward her just to see if he was touching her...Nope, he was hovering over her and close to her face...
That was it, he's pushed as far as he can push. I was shaking and blacking out with rage. I screamed and yelled, taking his fingers that was on my mom's hips and twisted them...Sadly, I didn't break anything but he jumped up with surprise for sure..........and you know what? My mother wakes up...Tells ME to calm down. No, not her "friend" that waited for us to sleep to touch her. Me.
After threatening the asshole to stay away from my mother and I (mom is laughing cause they're "like brother and sister") and putting my pocket knife opened and next to me, she fell asleep as if nothing is wrong....I stayed up....I'm awake at 4AM cause I don't trust him. After the whole night having him scream and fight with me...He touched my mom again, I punched his hand away.
I just don't understand, he was touching/hovering above her when he assumed we were asleep and I get told I'm over reacting....AFTER I hear him talking dirty about my mom......That's fucking nice....